I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
