Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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