let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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