Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
