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Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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