get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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