dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
