You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Randomize
