You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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