Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
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