So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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