You're so nebulous sometimes
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
