Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Randomize
