A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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