the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
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