Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
