I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
