A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
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