come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize