We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
