I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
