Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Randomize