her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
