I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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