Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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