If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
