The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
