highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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