He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
