yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Randomize
