all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I think I sprained my soul last night
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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