it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
