I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
