If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
