haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
