Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
