I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
