I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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