Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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