You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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