i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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