I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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