Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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