So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
