i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
