You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
