All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
3pm strippers are depressing
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
