ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
