btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
