Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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