help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
