The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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